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Intro -x2-: C  C7  Fsus2  G7sus4  G7

Verse:
    C                                   C7
Sid Vicious played a four-string Fender bass guitar and couldn’t sing 
     Fsus2                   G7sus4           G7
And everybody hated him except the ones who loved him 
   C                          C7 
A ukulele has four strings, but Sid did not play ukulele   
Fsus2                               G7sus4          G7 
He did smack and probably killed his girlfriend Nancy Spungen 

Verse:
   C                     C7 
If only Sid had had a ukulele, maybe he could have been happy 
Fsus2                    G7sus4         G7 
Maybe he would not have suffered such a sad end 
   C                                  C7 
He maybe would have not done all that heroin instead 
           Fsus2                           G7sus4          G7 
He maybe would’ve sat around just singing nice songs to his girlfriend 

Chorus:
   C                               C7 
So play your favorite cover song, especially if the words are wrong 
     Fsus2                         G7sus4             G7 
Cos even if your grades are bad, it doesn’t mean you’re failing 
C                                 C7 
Do your homework with a fork and eat your fruit loops in the dark 
     Fsus2                               G7sus4       G7 
And bring your etch-a-sketch to work and play your ukulele 

Bridge:
Fsus2                     G7
Ukulele small and forceful, ukulele, brave and peaceful 
C                       Fsus2
You can play the ukulele too it is painfully simple 
Fsus2                   G7
Play your ukulele badly, play your ukulele loudly 
Bb6
Ukulele banish evil, ukulele save the people,

Ukulele gleaming golden on the top of every steeple 

Verse:
C                              C7 
Lizzie borden took an axe, and gave her mother forty whacks 
       Fsus2                         G7sus4    G7 
Then gave her father forty-one, and left a tragic puzzle 
   C                        C7 
If only they had given her an instrument, those puritans 
      Fsus2                           G7sus4             G7 
Had lost the plot completely, see what happens when you muzzle 

Verse:
    C                     C7 
A person’s creativity and do not let them sing and scream 
     Fsus2                               G7sus4   G7 
And nowadays it’s worse ‘cause kids have automatic handguns
   C                                 C7 
It takes about an hour to teach someone to play the ukulele 
  Fsus2                          G7sus4          G7 
About same to teach someone to build a standard pipe bomb you do the math-s-

Chorus:
   C                               C7 
So play your favorite cover song, especially if the words are wrong 
     Fsus2                         G7sus4             G7 
Cos even if your grades are bad, it doesn’t mean you’re failing 
C                                 C7 
Do your homework with a fork and eat your fruit loops in the dark 
     Fsus2                               G7sus4       G7 
And bring your etch-a-sketch to work and play your ukulele 

Bridge:
Fsus2                  G7 
Ukulele, thing of wonder, ukulele, wand of thunder
C                       Fsus2
You can play the ukulele too in London and down under 
Fsus2                                    G7
Play Joan Jett, and play Jacques Brel and Eminem and Neutral Milk
Bb6
Tell the children crush the hatred, play your ukulele naked 

If anybody tries to steal your ukulele, let them take it 

Verse:
C                           C7 
Imagine there’s no music, imagine there are no songs 
         Fsus2                          G7sus4     G7 
Imagine that John Lennon wasn’t shot in front of his apartment 
       C                              C7                         Fsus2
Now imagine if John Lennon had composed “Imagine” for the ukulele 
                          G7sus4      G7 
Maybe people would have truly got the message 

Verse:
     C                               C7 
You may think my approach is simple-minded and naïve 
           Fsus2                                 G7sus4          G7 
Like if you want to change the world then why not quit and feed the hungry 
     C                        C7 
But people for millennia have needed music to survive 
     Fsus2                            G7sus4      G7 
And that’s why I’ve promised John that I will not feel guilty 

Verse:
    C                                  C7 
So play your favorite Beatles song and make the subway fall in love 
        Fsus2             G7sus4    G7 
They’re only $19.95, that isn’t lots of money 
C                               C7 
Play until the sun comes up and play until your fingers suffer 
Fsus2                        G7sus4    G7 
Play LCD Soundsystem songs on your ukulele 

Verse:
C                                C7 
Quit the bitching on your blog and stop pretending art is hard 
     Fsus2                            G7sus4        G7 
Just limit yourself to three chords and do not practice daily 
       C                                  C7 
You’ll minimize some stranger’s sadness with a piece of wood and plastic 
Fsus2                   G7sus4    G7 
Holy xxxx it’s so fantastic, playing ukulele 

Verse:
C                                  C7 
Eat your homework with a fork and do your fruit loops in the dark 
     Fsus2
And bring your etch-a-sketch to work, your flask of jack, your vibrator 
your fear of heights, your nikon lens 

Verse:
      C                                  C7 
Your mom and dad, your disco stick, your soundtrack from “Karate Kid” 
      Fsus2                        G7sus4      G7 
Your ginsu knives, your rosary, your new Rebecca Black CD 
       C                                  C7 
Your favorite room, your bowie knife, your stuffed giraffe, your new glass eye 
      Fsus2                               G7sus4                G7 
Your sousaphone, your breakfast tea, your Nick Drake tapes, your giving tree 
      C                                     C7 
Your ice cream truck, your missing wife, your will to live, your urge to cry 
   Fsus2                                        C
Remember we’re all going to die so play your ukulele
This arrangement for the song is the author's own work and represents their interpretation of the song. You may only use this for private study, scholarship, or research. UkuWorld and its derivatives do not own any songs, lyrics or arrangements posted and/or printed.

9 Comments

  1. Oh my god!! Another masterpiece by Amanda Palmer I can jam out to!! I’m only twelve but the fact I can scream this when no ones home is really satisfying. Plus, it only took me a couple of minutes to learn these frets

  2. LizLizTheLizard

    I just like to scream sing this in my room when no one is home. It actually really helps with stress just scream sing your favorite song and BAM you have a smile plastered an your face

  3. Love this song! My friends love it when I play this for them, and it’s so fun to both play and sing!
    Tip: Play G7 on the last line of every bridge, it sounds really good!

  4. None Of Your Buisness

    It sounds closer to the original recording if you put a capo on the first fret. Just a tip. :)

  5. This is probably the best song ever. It really does have a great message and it’s so fun to play

  6. Thank you for having this song here. Having seen Amanda F*ing Palmer played the ukulele made me think that I could too. So I picked one up. Seeing this here makes me so happy and to know that I can play this song just like her.

  7. StaticEmotion

    I love this song. It just gives out a good message to people who need hope. That message is; pay $20 for a uke, things will be less hard. Also, it’s okay to drink at work.

  8. theclumsymutt

    i love this song, and this rendition is very nice!!

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