Intro: Fm Bbm C Fm Eb Db Bbm C Verse 1: Fm Bbm Just one drink! Gonna keep it mellow C Fm Responsible night for a polite fellow Eb Db Say, "Hello" to my friends and comrades Bbm C Don’t tend to offend so I say perhaps Fm Bbm Just two drinks! As a social courtesy C Fm We can raise a glass to our past fraternity Eb Db And certainly, a perfectly normal informal get together Bbm C But it’s been forever since we gathered so whatever Fm Bbm Just three drinks! For the sake of the old times C Fm Proceed with tequila shots with a dish full of cold limes Eb Db The whole nine, laughing, remembering all the old lines Bbm C Never used to work but I could 'em give another try Fm Bbm Just four drinks! Y'know, take the edge off C Fm I've had a hard week, I deserve to get sauced Eb Db Pick up another round as my friends depart and Bbm C They may not stick around but I just got started Chorus: Ab Fm Feel so much better than usual C Eb I feel indisputable, oh Ab Fm I think that I might be beautiful Verse 2: Fm Bbm Just five drinks! xxxxin' treat myself C Fm Pour the Dom Perignon from the back of the top shelf Eb Db Spend like God, put on airs to sell it Bbm C Crowd pretends not to care but I know they're jealous Fm Bbm Just six drinks! Let slip the dogs of war C Fm I’m gonna start a xxxxin' riot 'til I'm tossed out the front door Eb Db Zero to sixty, I can turn on a dime, I'm hitting bottom Bbm C And I'm feeling like committing a crime Fm Bbm Just eight drinks! Maybe I've lost count? C Fm I can’t remember the night, what I drank or the amount Eb Db I’m fading in and out, my very consciousness is crumbling Sorry, was I saying something? Fm Bbm Twelve drinks! Strolling out of the hospital C Fm Is it hair of the dog if you stay drunk and don't stop at all? Eb Db Another night, losing it, more than I can afford Bbm C Was I just feeling bored? Am I that insecure? Chorus: Ab Fm Feel so much better than usual C Eb I feel indisputable, oh Ab Fm But now, I'm feeling so beautiful C Eb Don’t wake me up from this spell I’m under if I'm still breathing Ab Fm I know that I will be ugly when C Eb I feel like myself again, oh Ab Fm But now, I'm feeling so beautiful Bridge: Fm Bbm Bottle of Scotch, served on the rocks with a shot of Cachaca C Fm Vodka, Sake, kamikaze with a handle of Sherry Eb Db a cherry Brandy with a Jaeger, chaser, Champagne float Bbm C a Bourbon, hot Toddy in teacup of throat coat Fm Bbm Martini, Bellini, Negroni, Baileys, Kahlua, Sambuca C Fm Soju, Paloma, Mojito, Gimlet, Frangelico, Guinness Eb Db Tequila, Manhattan, a Margarita, Old Fashioned Bbm C Dry Vermouth and something I can't taste 'cause I'm so trashed Fm Bbm Soldiering over, I'm slower, shoulder to shoulder with no one C Fm Stumbling, sobering, making friends with a smoker Eb Db I know I'm less than upright, losing the fight with the ground Bbm C Then someone hits the lights as they close for the night now Fm Dbm Try to look at Heaven and I can't see the stars C Fm a billion, trillion eyes are winking as I walk between parked cars Eb Db Metabolizing liquor while I'm losing my friends Bbm C I'm gonna hate myself tomorrow then I'll do it again Interlude: Fm Bbm C Fm Eb Db Bbm C Chorus: Ab Fm Feel so much better than usual C Eb I feel indisputable, oh Ab Fm But now, I'm feeling so beautiful C Eb Don’t wake me up from this spell I’m under if I'm still breathing Ab Fm I know that I will be ugly when C Eb I feel like myself again, oh Ab Fm But now, I'm feeling so beautiful Outro: G G7 My vision is blurry as long as I'm thirsty G Ab Ab Fm Nobody can hurt me, hurt me, hurt me
