Intro: A E B E

Luke:
         A           E          B              E
Come on, grab some ambrosia and let the nectar flow
A               E                      B                    E
Why is everyone scraping part of their plate into the fire?
             A                E
Is the food reAlly that bad?

Luke:
                    B
Offering to the gods
       E                        A           E             B
It's not enough that they're omnipotent and All-powerful
                    E            A
They need to feel appreciated
  E         B
To the Gods!

All:
 E
To the Gods!

Chorus:
A    E     B           E
Oh, things couldn't be worse
          A       E      B   E
When your parents run the uniVerse
A     E    B           Dbm
Oh, things couldn’t be worse
A         E            B   E
When your folks run the uniVerse

Luke:
A         E
My dad is Hermes
   B          E
He messengers things
A               E           B                E
You'll know his sign by his shoes with those wings
    A           E             B           Dbm
I'd wait by the phone but the phone never rings
  Gb
Oh no
     A            E    Ab          Dbm
When your dad's a god, life can be tough
  A           -nc-     B         E
I met the guy once and once was enough

Luke:
E
-Spoken- Annabeth?

Annabeth:
   G      D
My mom's Athena
      A               D
She’s smart and she’s wise
G               D          A               D
She’s sworn off gluten and she’s sworn off guys
       G           D          A       Bm
But if she came to camp, it’d be a surprise
   E
Oh no...

All:
   E
Oh no...

Annabeth:
           G             D                Gb            Bm
Oh, and my step-mom, she hates me, and my dad works All day

   G         -nc-      A      D
So I left Virginia and I ran away

Percy:
D
Wait, is that true?

Luke:
D
Everybody!

Chorus:
G   D      A           D
Oh, things couldn't be worse
          G       D      A   D
When your parents run the uniVerse
G   D      A           Bm
Oh, things couldn’t be worse
G         D            A   D
When your folks run the uniVerse

Luke:
D
-Spoken- Alright, who’s next?

Katie:
D
Oh! Okay, let me see…

Katie:
G          D
My mom’s Demeter
A          D
Goddess of grain
G          D          A            D
She gets excited when it starts to rain
    G            D            A            Bm
But planting and planting and planting’s a pain
   E
Oh no...

All:
   E
Oh no...
           G               D            Gb            Bm
Right! For their sixteenth birthday, my friends got a car
G        nc          A          D
I got a fern in some dumb mason jar

GROVER:
                    E
-Spoken- Bahahahaha! Ooh, ooh! My turn!
A              E
I’m a child of Pan
    B          E
The god of the wild
    A              E               B       E
For those who love nature, they’re often beguiled
         A         E            B           Dbm
He’s not reAlly my dad, but I’m sort of his child
   Gb
Oh no...

All:
   Gb
Oh no...
   A          E         Ab            Dbm
He went for a hike to explore new frontiers
    A          E            B            E
And no one has seen him for thousands of years

Chorus:
A    E     B           E
Oh, things couldn't be worse
          A       E      B   E
When your parents run the uniVerse
A     E    B           Dbm
Oh, things couldn’t be worse
A         E            B   E
When your folks run the uniVerse

Percy:
E
-Spoken- Chiron! Who’s your dad?

Chiron:
-nc-
-Spoken-Oh, well…
   A         E
My father is Kronos
  A         E
Remember my lecture?
B          E
He ate his children.

Luke:
-nc-                                        E
-Spoken- Chiron wins… How about you, Silena?

Silena:
    A          E
The goddess of love
   B          E
My mom’s Aphrodite
    A           E         B            E
She tries to be cool, but mainly she’s flighty
     A            E              B            Dbm
I’ll bring home a boy, and she’s there in her nightie

All:
   Gb
Oh no!!!

Silena:
Gb
-Spoken- It's so embarrassing guys!
  A             E         Ab       Dbm
I tried to seek help from even the Fates
           A            -nc-     B         E
‘Cause she steals my mascara and All of my dates

Luke:
F
-Spoken- Alright, Percy, it’s your turn

Percy:
-nc-
If I try to sing, it’ll probably cause an avalanche...

Luke:
-nc-
We’re All friends here. Come on, give it a shot.

Percy:
-nc-
Okay. Um…

Percy:
   Bb            F
My mom was named SAlly
    C           F
She loved scary movies
    Bb            F
And food that was blue and…

Katie:
-nc-
-Spoken- He’s doing it wrong

Silena:
-nc-
Yeah, who’s your godly parent?

Percy:
-nc-
Oh, I don’t know

Luke:
-nc-
It’s alright. a lot of half-bloods never know their godly parent. Just give it a try.

Percy:
       Bb          F
So, my dad is some god
C               F
That’s great, I guess
Bb         F           C            F
Did he not want me, or not want the stress?
    Bb           F            C         Dm
Too bad he’s the worst and my life is a mess!
G
Oh no...
  Bb           F     A      Dm
I hope that he shows even a trace
            Bb              -nc-     C            F
‘Cause I’ve got some choice words to throw in his face!

Chorus:
Bb  F      C           F
Oh, things couldn't be worse
          Bb      F      C   F
When your parents run the uniVerse
Bb  F      C           Dm
Oh, things couldn’t be worse

Luke:
F                          Bb
But I don't care where our parents may be
   C               Dm
As long as you are here with me

All:
F                       Bb
We don't care where our parents may be
   C               Dm
As long as you are here with me
   F       Bb      C         F
As long as you are here with me!