Intro:
   F A Bb -x3-
   F A Bb Db

Verse 1:
F         A   Bb
After the ball
Bb     Db
We all three of us
F        A
Two of a feather and
Bb    Db
One superfluous
  Bb
Retired to and from rooms and careers
    Bb
-Respectively-
A
Two electively
                       Bb
To conspire against one
-nc-
-Effectively-

Verse 2:
F           A
Partners in crime
D
Part-time extortionists
Dm
Property owners and
       A             Bbm
Out-of-proportionist mimes
            Bb
Lament the call to present
     G
In a top-heavy tent
          G
That they lent but don't rent out
     F           Bb
-For money, yet-

Pre-Chorus:
F         A
Sorry for trying
   Bb
To get in the act
  F            A
I thought a performance
   Bb
Was what y'all expected
      F            A
Turns out I'm more sideshow
     Bb
Than Cirque du Soleil
    F       A
But I value grit over
Bb
Fancy tricks anyway

Chorus:
F     Bb
Wine, dine
F     Bb
Wind down
        F     Bb
Another evening
F            Bb
Entertaining and complaining
F Bb   F       Bb
I stay dry and stall
    Gm
But still plummet into the apron
                F A Bb
Right after the ball
          F A Bb
After the ball

Interlude -x2-: F A Bb Db

Verse 3:
F         Am
After the ball
     Dm
They gloat through the glare
         F             Am
With the straightest disease
    Dm
The uncaring flakes
      Bbdim
On the lying trapeze

Verse 4:
     F          Am
They master the rings
   Dm
Contorting the facts
F           Am
Pickling the punks
Dm
Thwarting the unwitting
Bbm
Acorn Woodpecker, redheaded stepchild
G
Plucked from the granary, an indentured clown
        F       A  Bb
-On the face of it-
                       F           A   Bb
To counter cuts to the greasepaint budget
-nc-
-Presumably-

Pre-Chorus:
F         A
Sorry for trying
   Bb
To get in the act
  F            A
I thought a performance
   Bb
Was what y'all expected
      F            A
Turns out I'm more sideshow
     Bb
Than Cirque du Soleil
    F       A
But I value grit over
Bb
Fancy tricks anyway

Chorus:
 F Bb        F
"Unfortunate difficulty
Bb           F
Balancing chapeaugraphy."
Bb        F
I, on the contrary,
Bb
Bet I could
F                 Bb
Trot the globe's topography
F         Bb
Without a fall
   Gm
But still plummet into the apron
                F A Bb
Right after the ball
          F A Bb
After the ball

Pre-Chorus:
F         A
Sorry for trying
   Bb
To get in the act
  F            A
I thought a performance
   Bb
Was what y'all expected
      F            A
Turns out I'm more sideshow
     Bb
Than Cirque du Soleil
    F       A
But I value grit over
Bb
Fancy tricks anyway
F       A
I value grit over
Bb
Fancy tricks anyway

Outro -x4-: F A Bb Db