Intro: G7 C F7 G F C Verse 1: C Am C7 F F7 I'm the first-person they talk about in all the books C Am C7 F F7 I'm the perspective you can not doubt, see how I look C Am C7 F F7 Control the narrative reliably, baby, it's all about me C Am C7 F F7 and I wrote the book about throwing the book at those who don't do it by it Pre-Chorus 1: E Am So now I’m holding myself hostage Stockholm lust just looks for justice E Am A And enough lefts don’t make the right but two wrongs do, oh man, Sun Tzu would love this Dm G C Cmaj7 Am Am7 Beating my dead high horse off the high road to low ground F G C C7 ‘Cause if you shake your fists at snakes in grass it looks like punching down! Chorus 1: F G C Am So God forbid I'm seen just as an average human being F G C A7 I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene F G E7 Am I'm the gap between a tragedy and comedy Fm G C don't come at me, I'm the main character and you have to like me Interlude: C F7 G F C Verse 2: C Am C7 F F7 I loot plot armor from NPC's, well, they are to me C Am C7 F F7 Trite, tropes, traits, traumas, trinkets, and treats; it's all XP C Am C7 F F7 Look in the sky, it's a bird! It's a plane! No, it’s super-ego! The underdog you cheer for C Am C7 F F7 Villains are everywhere, that's how I know that I'm the hero Pre-Chorus 2: E7 Am So tie me to the train tracks, laugh and snidely twist your mustache E7 Am A Snidely Whiplash, Boris Badinov, ignorin’ me's bad enough Dm G C Cmaj7 Am Where do you get off? Da, dasvidaniya, darling, Daleks in high collars Am7 F G C C7 monologue and I outsmart them with a ray-gun and a tweet Chorus 1: F G C Am So God forbid I'm seen just as an average human being F G C A7 I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene F G E7 Am I'm the gap between a tragedy and comedy Fm G C don't come at me, I'm the main character and you have to like me Instrumental -x3-: C F7 G F C Pre-Chorus 3: E Am Judge me by what my cover shows, author becomes beyond reproach E Am A you don't know the prose, or if the spine is still intact Dm G C Cmaj7 Am Am7 Oh, like Alice fell to wonderland come Astroturf my Overton F G C C7 And bolden my demand to live by alternative facts Bridge: F G C Cmaj7 Am Am7 Her majesty says “the royal we demand a standard of loyalty F G C C7 An agreement to be reverent, lick the emperor’s new boots” F G E Am The court fool got the guillotine, the witches the stake, you the dopamine Fm C And Siemens made the Zyklon B but we all still get the flu. F G C7 We all do what we need to to get through. -It’s nothing new- Fm G C C7 But I ain't done one xxxxing thing to you! Chorus 2: F G C Cmaj7 Am So God forbid I'm seen just as an average human being Am7 F G C C Bbdim7 I mean, imagine if antagonists lacked any evil scheme F G E7 Am And I'm the gap between a tragedy and comedy Fm G C don't come at me, I'm the main character and you have to like me
