Verse:
       Abm
So you wanna marry Daisy,
         E7              Eb7
Yeah well good luck with that
      Dbm7
You got about as much of a chance
              Dbm7
Of licking the brim of my hat
       Abm             Bb7
She’s a purebred, her forehead’s
        B7              Db7
Worth about as much as your car
      E7
So let’s just say your little bouquet
     Eb7
Won’t get you very far

Verse:
    Abm
But slow down there slick
       E7                 Eb7
See my sleeves are full of tricks,
       Dbm7
You just say the word and I’ll have you birds
             Dbm7
Kissing at the Ritz
      Abm               Bb7
And my price? It’s nothing, it’s cookie crumbs
     B7                    Db7
-More of a steal if you ask me-
     E7
In terms of conditions, my friend
      Eb7sus4    Eb7
I’ve only got three

Bridge:
      Abm
Rule one: congratulations son,
         Gbm6              B7       
You’ve been promoted to private eye
          Emaj7
I want a page a week on
Every word she speaks
      Bbm7           Ebm7
And brother, don’t ask why
     Abm
Rule two: you see that window
     Gbm6                B7       
Right above mademoiselle's boudoir?
        Emaj7
Won’t you be a doll and unlock it?
                Bbm7
I gotta make a quick withdrawal
      Ebm7
And a small deposit


    Abm
And last but not least
          Dbm7
-Listen up close kid,
                 Emaj7       
This one’s for your own good-
         -nc-
If that girl ever twirls her little brunette curls

And leans in close to say,
B7       
“Meet me under the magnolia tonight

If you wanna get a little crazy…”
Db7         #
Well you turn and run for the hills,

Straight and fast
         Eb7
Because crazy’s Daisy’s way of saying

You’ll end up laying on the
Eb7             Abm    Ebm7 -x2-
Wrong side of the grass

Verse:
          Abm
So you wanna marry Daisy,
         E7                     Eb7
Well that death wish don’t come free
      Dbm7
But a wicked dream needs a wicked schemer
   Dbm7
So thank heavens you met me
             Abm    Bb7       B7     Db7
She’s got a two-ply, cream pie, uni degree
      E7           Eb7         Abm
In stealing from suckers like you
           Abm       Bb7
She’s got a two-ply, cream pie
 B7          Db7
Hard knocks degree
   E7   Eb7sus4    Eb7
In feasting on suckers -

On suckers like

Outro:
Dbm9      Ab         
Eb7sus4   Abm6
You.